Love truth or.......

What is love? Does anyone know what it is? I am not talking about love of family or friends, I am talking true love, soul mate love. Does it exist? I truly thought it did! I found my love at least I thought I did, when I was 28/29 years old. I was living in Los Angeles at the time, I thought he was my soul mate but ended up being let's just say not so nice after a while. He still had that thing that every girl wishes for which is a person who could read your mind, know exactly what you want and what you think. He was that to me, until he got mean, I learned a lot from him and I owe him a lot of gratitude for making me stronger. I remember when we first got to know each other it was as if we were old friends. In my mind we were both old souls, I know some of you may think I am crazy but I always felt that in all my past lives we were always meant for each other but something always came between us, kinda like an old fashion tragedy. Yeah this may be a bit dramatic but it is how I felt and I am sure he felt the same. We used to have this thing that we wouldn't say 'I Love You' we would show it by the little things we did. He made me see how just saying love didn't mean what I thought it meant. It means more to show someone by little things, how you feel, the word love is just that a word until it becomes a meaning. He would make me feel so alive and connected to him. Part of me still cares for him and the other half is just eeeehh. I feel that I had my true and first love so now I really don't look for love or for a man. I know now that if I stay single that means nothing it just means I am strong the way I am. Don't get me wrong if I ever run into or find a suitable partner for me I will give him a chance if not I am not gonna die!! The one a call my true love is the one that made me the way I am today, I am strong, independent, not afraid to speak, and most importantly I have my own mind. Granted I had to go through HELL just to get my own courage, sometimes I am a bit too much but that's me so people just has to get used to it. After he had cheated on me,(and lied about it) I decided to change my way of being I became more out there and more 'who cares' attitude. Not in a mean way but in my own way. Like if I am fat 'who cares' you don't like how I think 'who cares' that type of a way. Oddly enough that type of attitude got a lot of guys attention, who knew, none worked out but at least I was getting attention I never before had. I had lots of fun with my new way of being, meaning I went out a lot, no thinking naughty now!!! I started seeing two guys and they were so sweet to me but nothing more then that we would go out and with the other we would have long conversations. So I gotta say I had my time, where I felt like a special girl. I get bugged a lot by older family members asking me when I am getting married or IF I am dating or why I am not married yet. I am 35 years old and for my culture I should have been married a long time ago, but I am not. I think does a woman really need a man to be happy? NO! I maybe older then the marring age but was never that type of girl to be dreaming of a wedding day. I never imagined my wedding day like so many other normal girls, I would imagine what I would look like on stage, or what I would say on an interview. I guess that just means I was meant to be a strong, independent, woman. No man is needed to be happy, just happiness in yourself. So as long as you LOVE yourself no matter what you look like or do then that's what you should always see. Love can be anything you want it to be. It can come in any shape, it can be any person, some find love without looking and others find love in the oddest places. So before you say love make sure and mean it sometimes its better to show it then just say it.